Now in her 30s, Kilikita’s hormonal condition and skin is mostly under control. However, the change has been an emotional rollercoaster, one she didn’t expect: “Every morning, I wake up and pass my hands over my face, feeling for new spots, and each time I’m confused that there aren’t any,” says Kilikita. “I spent years painstakingly treating under-the-skin spots, whiteheads, and blackheads, and often crying myself to sleep over my skin. Society tells me I should be happier now that my acne is under control, especially considering our fixation with ‘flawless’ skin. I became the loud, confident girl at school in a bid to mask my insecurities. But when you’ve based your whole personality around your acne, and it suddenly disappears, so too does a part of you. Sometimes, I look in the mirror and I don’t recognize my face. It’s perplexing.”
