For many young Americans, dating is becoming as much about finances as it is romance.
Half of single Americans surveyed said they are going on fewer dates or choosing less expensive activities because of rising costs, according to BMO Financial Group’s 2026 BMO Real Financial Progress Index. The bank polled 2,501 adults in late December through January.
Not only that, but 48% of Gen Z adults and 40% of millennials surveyed said the high price of dating gets in the way of reaching their financial goals. A single date costs Gen Z adults $205 on average and millennials $252 on average, BMO found.
Nearly half of singles, 47%, said dating just isn’t worth the expense, according to the survey.
It’s just one affordability pressure among many these days. Consumers are grappling with higher costs for everyday essentials such as gas, groceries, housing and health insurance — reflecting a mix of factors including energy shocks tied to the ongoing war with Iran and President Donald Trump’s tariff policies.
“We’re seeing that there is this increased cost of living, and it’s lowering our dating frequency and how we’re seeing or perceiving dating,” Sabrina Romanoff, a clinical psychologist, told CNBC. “We’re seeing people have fewer dinners out and there’s a lower tolerance for higher-risk meetups.”
Costs make people date ‘defensively’
For Gen Z, the cost of dating can add up quickly.
The typical Gen Z American went on about nine dates in the prior year, according to BMO’s data. That puts their annual outlay at roughly $1,845. That tally encompasses the costs leading up to the date, including transportation and grooming, as well as what’s actually spent during the date.
Using Bureau of Labor Statistics data for full-time workers, that would amount to roughly 3% to 5% of median annual income for workers ages 16 to 34.
Romanoff said rising costs make people date “much more defensively,” adding: “They’re taking fewer chances and fewer connections are formed.”
That dynamic shows up in how young daters talk about first dates.
David Kuang, a 21-year-old Columbia University student, said the economics of dating can make every outing feel like a gamble.
“There’s such a higher chance that something doesn’t click,” he said. “And then there goes your $40 dinner bill down the drain on someone that you might never talk to again.”
Leo Gabriel, a 22-year-old living in New York City, also said he tries to keep first dates affordable.
“I would probably spend around $45 to $50,” he said. “It’s enough not to break the bank.”
Overall, Gabriel said, he budgets around $150 to $200 a month for dating.
“Why would I spend $100 on someone I might not even vibe with?” he added.
Finding a date can be expensive, too
The cost of dating itself is only part of the story. For millions of users, finding a date means paying for the apps. Pew Research Center found in 2022 that 35% of dating app users have paid for one of the platforms. Research from Morgan Stanley found the average paying dating app user spent around $19 a month in 2023.
“Many of these apps work on what’s called a ‘freemium’ premium strategy,” said Pinar Yildirim, an associate professor at Wharton who studies online platform economics. “Even though you can sign up for free, in order to be able to take advantage of some of the more desirable features, you might have to pay a subscription price.”
That model has become more important as Americans have shifted the way they meet. A widely cited 2019 study from researchers at Stanford University and the University of New Mexico found that from the end of World War II until 2013, the most common way straight couples met in the U.S. was through friends. Now, the dominant path is online.
“One of the things that online dating apps and online dating platforms in general [have] managed to bring to our life is a greater range of people,” Yildirim said. “They tend to generally increase our pool size.”
But, she added, that can also “be a bit deceiving.” An abundance of candidates can overwhelm users and reduce the odds that an interaction turns into something meaningful.
“Even though you might be seeing and potentially starting conversations with many, many different types of people and high numbers of people, you’re most likely not going to go into anything beyond those initial conversations with those people on the apps,” she said.
Experts say that may help explain why many users shell out for a paid dating app tier. “It’s a system of pay to play,” Romanoff said. “And if you have the money, then you will be able maybe to get the partner, or you will be able to have more success on dating apps.”
Gabriel said he briefly subscribed to Hinge because the paid upgrades’ “gamification,” as he called it, was effective.
“Psychologically, it does work,” he said. “You’re like, oh, you’re going to only get seen by X amount of people in a day. But if you pay us a tiny bit more, you get to see more people.”
But what dating app upgrades cost can vary, and consumer advocates have said the pricing is opaque.
A spokesperson from Match Group — parent company of Match.com, OkCupid, Tinder, Hinge and other dating sites — told CNBC via email that “the vast majority” of users on its sites employ free versions. “Subscriptions are optional and provide additional tools for those who want more control or a more efficient experience, but they are not required to have success or make meaningful connections,” they said.
Bumble Inc., whose apps include Bumble Date and Badoo, told CNBC that it aims to provide a “safe and high-quality” free tier. “There are countless couples who have found each other this way,” a spokesperson said in an emailed statement. “Our paid features cater to those in our community who are looking for a more tailored experience.”
— CNBC’s CJ Haddad and Isabel Iino contributed reporting.
